Well, if you're one of the select few who've made the bold choice to fly Allegiant Air (free beverages are overrated anyway, right?), from the chilly realm of Appleton towards the sunshine-laden oasis of Charleston International, then buckle up. You're in for an experience rivaled only by a ride on a 1960's roller coaster.

First off, who needs luxe, shiny terminals with overpriced coffee shops and fancy lounges anyway? Appleton, in its glorious mediocrity, offers you a brilliantly underwhelming start to your journey: An open, light-strewn room that yawns with its unpretentious charm. Its wistful air often makes one wonder about the marvels that lie in the world beyond.

And then comes Allegiant: the Subaru of the skies, the air chariot of the proletariat. Can't afford to check a bag? Well, who needs a change of clothes anyway? Or luggage that isn't relegated to the size of a shoebox? In fact, it's character-building to travel with just the bare necessities. You’ll cherish the penny-pinching memories in the long run, trust me.

Stepping into one of Allegiant's Boeing's is akin to a stroll down memory lane when leg space was a myth, and Wi-Fi was as much of a distant dream as flying cars. But don't let that dishearten you. This barebones adventure in the sky is perfectly complemented by cards and books. Remember those? Yes, those printed blocks of magical stories that don’t require a screen. Told you Allegiant was taking you on a nostalgic trip.

Now, Charleston International. The word 'International' does make a bid to pull one over you, implying an airport abuzz with planes from every corner of the world. With all of eight gates (and no frequent flyer lounge to speak of), it's 'International' in the same way a Hot Pocket might be considered 'Gourmet'.

However, it does have a certain southern charm, almost as if it's offering you a warm, cotton wool blanket after your minimalistic encounter with Allegiant. The air itself seems thicker, happier, more content - further proof, as if any were needed, that you've left the icy barriers of Wisconsin behind.

Don't let the flight attendants' plastered-on smiles beguile you - they’re well-versed in the lexicon of friendly passive aggression. And remember, flying Allegiant only gives you bragging rights for enduring the aviation equivalent of an all-inclusive 'unique' experience. It’s a test of endurance, fortitude and how long you can live without basic amenities onboard.

Regardless, you chose this adventurous path, didn’t you? So lean back into that non-reclining seat, stash away your compact carry-on in that oh-so-tight overhead bin, and inhale the stale remnants of complementary cabin air. Because in a handful of hours, you'll be landing in the wonderful embrace of Charleston, theoretically 'international', realistically provincial; and at the end of the day, that's what makes the journey worthwhile. You’ve survived Allegiant, and no one can deny you the taste of victory that is Charleston's charmingly eccentric airport.

Happy traveling, or whatever it's being referred as on Allegiant Air!