If you're brave enough to board an Allegiant Airline flight from Appleton to Newark Liberty International Airport - or as I like to call it, the thrill ride of the skies - then buckle up, settle in, and fasten your sense of humor. Because you'll need it.

The takeoff alone is akin to climbing Mount Everest, without the Sherpa. One moment you're on solid ground in quaint little Appleton, and the next, you're hurtling 35,000 feet in the air in a metal contraption piloted by someone who, with a bit of luck, got more than 6 hours of sleep last night.

No timid attempts at mild turbulence here. This is roller coaster territory, my friend, where each dip and bounce is a gratuitous reminder that you're defying the laws of gravity. And the view? Forget the serenity of clouds and skies. You'll have no such luck. It's more likely you'll witness the fascinating traffic patterns over the Tri-State Area. Skyscrapers, cars, and the specks of Central Park - hardly what Van Gogh had in mind, I assure you.

And let's talk about onboard entertainment - or should I say, the exercise of your imagination? On Allegiant Airlines, there's no fancy touchscreen attached to the seat in front of you, brimming with the latest Hollywood blockbusters. Oh no, that would be far too straightforward. Instead, you're implored to gaze out the window or perhaps plunge into the depths of existential contemplation. Or, if you're lucky, engage in the exciting game of 'What's that smell?' as a fellow passenger opens their homemade tuna sandwich. Riveting, isn't it?

When it comes to refreshments, the charming flight attendants will appear, trolleys stocked with nothing short of airplane delicacies. You've got your compressed sandwiches, carelessly-flung peanuts, and a selection of sodas so flat, they appear to be in competition with the Great Plains. And alcohol? Well, it's always 5 o'clock somewhere, especially when hurtling through the atmosphere in a compact aircraft.

If you're flying at night, you are in for a treat. The lullaby light from the overhead consoles that diffuses any sense of alertness or wakefulness, is enough to make anyone drift into a falsely assured sleep. Rest easy, they imply, it's just like sleeping in a sardine can, high above the Atlantic coastline.

The grand finale though is reserved for the arrival at Newark Liberty International. This is where the real fun happens. Once you step off that aircraft, onto the scintillating linoleum of the Newark capacious edifice, take a deep breath because you've made it to the Garden State! And what could be more joyful than the aroma of stale coffee and the faint outline of Lady Liberty waving to you from a distant horizon?

So gear up, fellow wayfarers, it's an adventure from Appleton to Newark via Allegiant Airlines. They might not promise you five-star service, or even three-star for that matter, but they do offer something far more valuable - a journey you'll never forget.